Madge DoRightly

Settling

2011-08-18T21:16:00.002-07:00

I have always had an aversion to phones. Particularly answering them or calling someone with one. I also don't "do voicemail".
If I really let it, it can become a problem . A definite stick in the craw to friends and family. But aside from annoying my friends I realized a while back that if I wanted to get anywhere I might have to suck it up and do things like answer the phone. And the more ridiculous the aversion or fear, the more likely that it was something that would help me grow and move along the path I'd started. It becomes a pride thing. I know that if I don't start answering the phone the I'll be settling for mediocrity.
Now who would knowingly choose that?

2011-08-18T21:13:00.002-07:00

He commanded himself to be numb against feeling for so long that when he discovered he did want to feel again he found the he could not. He had forgotten how.

Adventures of Mullet Mom: On Turning 30

2011-06-24T19:19:00.000-07:00

Adventures of Mullet Mom: On Turning 30: "Thirty, sounds dirty, like thirsty, 30 years, 30 hours, more than a day. 30 minutes to myself as sweetpea does her late nap thing. 30 breath..."

baby don't hurt me

2011-05-12T06:26:00.000-07:00

Relationships. Nearly everyone is in one or wants to be in one and everyone goes about that so differently. It rests in the intention I guess. I have always gone into them quickly but with full force, giving a lot, wanting to give a lot, wanting...that intangible thing that I see my parents have. I tried to shape these relationships into "the one" without realizing it.

I'm more romantic than I thought.

Frustrated, I wondered if I even knew what that kind love was, if I could even recognize it, if it were even real or just something people fooled themselves into. Do I get a soulmate, if there is such a thing? Trying and trying to figure it out, breaking hearts, breaking my own heart along the way...what is love???

Eventually hitting the equivalent of rock bottom, feeling awkward and wooden around people, going completely crazy, letting my mind go into a rocketship roller coaster and generally spend the first part of my trip in Europe not knowing if I were sitting or standing up.

And then, Amsterdam.

Suddenly the skies clear and I find myself in a park, realizing I'm letting go of all these fears, of all these things I think I should be, how I should act, what a relationship is supposed to look like or how a partner is supposed to be or act. It sounds cheesy but I felt myself just filling up with love, my heart was full again.

and its fucking awesome.

2011-03-20T22:08:00.002-07:00

"Your marriage partner is the only family member you get to choose and you expect me to make that precious choice based on superficial qualifications?"

so much nobility

2011-03-15T14:08:00.002-07:00

"hiding your ex's on facebook is one of mankind's most noble pursuits"

Dudes be warned

2011-03-14T16:07:00.001-07:00

From the blog of Christopher Zane

RP had just finished a story about how a friend of his elected to live on the street after a bad breakup.

"Most men shouldn't be allowed to be single," I said. "Without women, it's an inevitable devolution into the lowest standard of living we allow ourselves. Before you know it your dinners consist of fistfuls of fajita chicken consumed in front of an open refrigerator while you're wearing your underwear."

"Sounds like you're speaking from experience."

"Yup."

avoidance

2011-03-14T15:57:00.003-07:00

That uncomfortable feeling

we both have

Let's not force it, eh?

any more time spent

together

and we'll soon be fighting about,

God, who cares what...

but how you drive

and how I cook

most likely

2011-03-12T08:23:00.003-07:00

"if you love me now this is only because you are not seeing the whole

of me (thinks the (Groucho)Marxist), and if you're not yet seeing the

whole of me it would be crazy to grow used to your love until such

time as you do"

-Alain DeBotton

2011-03-12T08:20:00.003-07:00

what could be more

i'mportant

on a rainy day

when the sky has turned

against your plans

than staying here

drinking this hot tea

and watching this French film

that doesn't seem

to have

a point

2011-01-03T14:27:00.002-07:00

Dead Christmas trees run down the street

Footprints crease the ice and sleet

Laughter sounds out to the night

Mouths wide open, eyes shine bright

Pine needles cling to hair bleached white

And wild mane, dark as night

Midnight gone and long forgotten

When glasses clinked and coats were brought in

To a moment one could not forget

A time when you felt infinite.

Meg Cusack, age 18

status updates/quotes

2010-12-08T17:24:00.002-07:00

‎"Republicans might be willing to let homosexuals die for their country once everyone making over $500,000/year is allowed to park in handicapped spaces and is, by law, addressed as 'gov'nor' in an English accent." - John Oliver on repealing "Don't Ask, Don't Tell"

"WikiLeaks is what happens when the entire US government is forced to go through a full body scanner. -Evgeny Morozov"

"Have you helped a lovely widowed wife of a rich Nigerian Official with her money transfer troubles recently?-Savia Stevenson"

2010-11-30T23:01:00.001-07:00

"I think it's perfectly alright for a woman to be mannish" Carol Burnett

Eggs

2010-11-29T09:23:00.002-07:00

Message Received 10:45 AM: Hey I moved your eggs, they're on the top shelf now not the side. In case you can't find them later.

Message Received 10:47 AM: Mark the day and time, most boring text ever. Sorry!

We all make choices

2010-11-16T20:01:00.002-07:00

it's an addiction, a need, a drive.

Mom says our dad goes by rational, he trusts his head before anything. She herself has a heart which is number one we choices must be made, big or little.

My brother and I are guts(y) people but from different angles, different perspectives. Right field. Left field. Not always(not often) what you expect, not even from each other.

From him I learned that often black and white are better than gray. Gray may be most diplomatic or fair but sitting in gray gets you no where. Also I learned that when you choose black or white, be confident in your choice, stand by it and back it up, back yourself up in the same action.

Mom taught me empathy: care please, about others. Consider what they're going through, try to understand them before making a judgment. Be kind to yourself, you don't owe anybody anything that compromises your health or happiness, and do see that that applies just the same for those anybody while you're at it.

Dad is funny, we might be the same in temperament though we make choices differently. Butting heads all the time, but with a sense of humor. There's no reason not to see the humor, no matter the situation. Life is funny, choices are funny and be sure of that. Be rational, break apart a situation. This happened, why did it happen, how did it happen, what're you going to do about?

and always push push push, move forward, expect more of yourself, know who you are and why you take these directions.

Life is for living.

2010-11-16T19:54:00.000-07:00

what do you do when you don't know what else to do?

Stay home, listen to music, drink several large jars of water

What sort are you

2010-11-05T21:02:00.005-07:00

There comes a time when you realize an utter truth about yourself, that at the culmination (20-35) of your time here, you just realized: this is me.
ASAt a certain degree, this is the driving force inside you that makes decisions, causes your effect.

In myself is the adventurer, but more than that, an adventurer that feels they can't say no but still has the will to know the difference between rational risk and mortal danger. I will not try just anything, but in the act of saying no I will feel some guilt, for not being trying this new thing. For what other reason is there in living but to take on the things which scare us?
I will always be wanting more from my life, will expect it.

In your existence, who are you and what do you want?

2010-10-05T21:37:00.000-07:00

falling in love is like taking a deep breath after holding it for so, so long

Beauty School

2010-08-06T09:45:00.001-07:00

If you can't change your surroundings try instead to change your perception of your surroundings, and how they apply to you.

Sweet Corn Ice Cream

2010-06-22T19:39:00.001-07:00

Totally vegan, gluten free, dairy free

4 c corn kernels
1 c cashews
1/2 c agave syrup
1 tbs grated lime zest
1 tbs lime juice
1 1/2 tsp vanilla exract
1 tsp salt

Puree 2 cups of corn,1/2 cup cashews and 1 cup water til smooth. Transfer puree to another bowl, repeat with remaining corn/cashews/water.

Strain puree well, discard solids left in strainer.

Whisk agave/lime juice and zest/vanilla and salt. Mix all ingredients then throw in Ice cream maker following manufacturers directions.

Yumz!

The Technologies

2010-05-18T21:24:00.000-07:00

"1) everything that’s already in the world when you’re born is just normal;

2) anything that gets invented between then and before you turn thirty is incredibly exciting and creative and with any luck you can make a career out of it;

3) anything that gets invented after you’re thirty is against the natural order of things and the beginning of the end of civilisation as we know it until it’s been around for about ten years when it gradually turns out to be alright really."

-Douglas Adams from his essay
How to Stop Worrying and Learn to Love the Internet
http://www.douglasadams.com/dna/19990901-00-a.html

Beets

2010-04-27T16:29:00.002-07:00

To eat a beet
and then forget
that we ate that beet
to think, then, that we are bleeding

internally

when we see "bloody" piss

is to remember that we did
eat that beet
and to be happy to be alive

the answer

2010-03-26T17:03:00.002-07:00

Is it better to be happy, but more reliably comfortable and stable or is it better to go out, take risks always and put yourself in uncomfortable situations in order to learn more?

The answer would be, as usual, a middle ground. But not to lose sight of the need for uncomfortable situations or happy comfort.

Because the Apocolypse doesn't have to be lonely

2010-01-29T14:19:00.001-07:00

http://mingle2.com/zombieharmony/free-dating-sites

Who stole the cookie?

2010-01-29T11:49:00.002-07:00

"Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar"
"Joey!"
"Joey stole the cookie from the cookie jar"
Joey, with delight "who me?"
"yes you!" the circle of children scream
"Couldn't be!"
"Then who?"
"ummm" Joseph deliberates for a moment "Arnold did, Arnold stole the cookie from the cookie jar!"
Arnold turns red, the class waits for his sing-song denial
Instead he grabs a fistful of nearby crayons and throws them at the circle
"I WOULD NEVER DO THAT I AM A DIABETIC!"
The class sits in shocked silence as Arnold runs from the room, teacher just behind.
Joey turns to the classmate on his left
"The funny thing is, he's not a diabetic, just a thief."

Things I thought about

2010-01-29T09:09:00.002-07:00

whilst prissily grouching at work:

-All closing shifts and no early cuts 6 days a week make Madge want to kick down the host stand.
-It's just one week, surely next week there will be more variety.
-I'd rather work at 6 AM 6 days a week over working til ten 6 days a week.
-It's not the players, it's the goddamn game.
-Soon this will not be an issue, chill out.
-Ahhhhhhh!

Sunny Sheisters

2010-01-25T13:03:00.002-07:00

Daniel: I hate those big "Jackie O" sunglasses.
Madge: Oh yeah, why's that?
Daniel: They trick you into thinking girls are hotter than they are. You get a glance and all you see is hair, end of nose and mouth. You have to really stare to see what they look like...yet another shoddy beauty tactic to fool men. You women should be ashamed.

2010-01-14T08:38:00.001-07:00

Don't do this thing for anyone but you
or you'll spend your life wondering
was it the right thing to do

2009-12-22T12:21:00.003-07:00

"You've been given a great gift George, the chance to see what life would be like if you'd never been born"
-Clarence the second class angel

Maybe he's right, most people probably would want to know. I'd like to see that, though I think probably my impact as it is wouldn't be so huge.

New Years

2009-12-21T09:03:00.002-07:00

Been thinking about New Years Eve plans. We'll probably be having a party at my house this year. It just works better to be at home, getting drunk with your nearest and dearest rather than trying to find the best parties all over town or have to pay for an event and fight for booze and elbow room.
Thinking about that though, made me think about New Years Eve past, particularly when I was a little 'un, and what it meant then. Most of the time it was kind of boring, involved a babysitter and watching the ball drop on T.V., sometimes a friend was there.
It makes me wonder what other kids were doing for new years. Did they have slumber parties or family traditions? What did you do?

2009-11-29T21:37:00.001-07:00

Few people became our role models because that was their intention. Most became role models because it was their intention to be themselves.-dad

Bitch is the new Black

2009-11-23T08:50:00.003-07:00

"This is what bothers me the most, people say that Hillary is a bitch. Well let me say something about that. Yeah! She is. And so am I. And so is this one (points to Amy Poehler, who nods) Bitches get stuff done. That's why Catholic Schools use nuns instead of priests... At the end of the year you hated those bitches, but you knew the capital of Vermont."
-Tina Fey

Past Consideration

2009-11-23T08:24:00.000-07:00

Love is more than one word. It’s been said before but still, societal norm is to place importance on romantic love and familial love alone. But there are many way of familial love and many ways of romantic love, like the difference between powdered snow and hard snow.

Romantic love, that feeling in your gut, that punch in your heart. Familial love, that warm feeling in your belly, that expansive uplifting love that can be shared with friendship love, those people who become your family, who shape you and you shape them. And on and on…

What it is that I desire is a bit of each, without too much struggle, please. A relationship needs work, it’s not work itself. A partnership is fun, it’s fulfilling, it contains the practical, it’s progressing and beautiful and you want to help and support each other. And if I can’t have that I’d rather be alone. But I think I can have that. I think I do now…I think I have before, but the timing wasn’t there.

Urgh. I don’t trust my own feelings anymore, I don’t feel sure of my next action. I’ve spent too much time thinking about the past, the future, what other people think and less time paying attention to how I feel now. And I want to shake that, and I think I will. I’m so close to clarity. With every new boy I kiss, every date I go one with a sexy/sweet/interesting man the more sure I am about progressing the other way. I think about how I should be working on my career, spending time with my loved friends, on my hobbies and in my bike community. About how I have someone in front of me that I resist missing when he’s not around, resist admitting that I might love, resist spending too much time with or getting too close or talking to friends about. Because it means something, I guess. But I could stop thinking so much about what my friends will say, about what I’ve said, about what he’s done in the past and see what is here, now and relax with the flow. Let myself be happy in this way again. But slowly. Very, very slowly.

Na na na

2009-11-08T17:47:00.001-07:00

A diva is a female version of a hustla

Alone Times

2009-11-08T17:45:00.001-07:00

Being alone after
Not being alone
for so long is freeing
and also lonely when at last
you are tired of yourself

100 cigarettes

2009-11-02T17:24:00.000-07:00

I've dated enough narcissistically neurotic men to know that you are all just a pack of roving babies in search of a giant teat from which to suck the lifeblood out of me until I am a hollow shell.

New Ideas

2009-10-19T16:25:00.001-07:00

“well what do you want me to do? I never said I wouldn’t try a new idea”
“yes you did! You said “I don’t want to try new things, I don’t like this”
“well I just meant then, not now!”
“So…then you do want to go down on me?”
“uh, yea…yeah”
“look, even if you tried it I wouldn’t enjoy it because I know you don’t enjoy it”
He puffed, exasperated “I just have never done it before! I just don’t like it yet!”
“Oh never mind!”
She left the room. He sat back, unhappy but slightly relieved.
She came back for an abrupt moment.
“…but don’t think I’m going down on you. Fair is fair.

senses of urgency

2009-09-24T11:38:00.002-07:00

Kissing the lip of a beer mug
filled with coffee, honey and cream
sitting here on this nice couch
thinking about what it is to think
no despair here people are happy
productively talking on a rainy day
Rock n Roll plays behind
the baristas counter
Do I miss this environment
for the one I work in now?
The Dallas people, big hair big heels
big hard tits on living girls
soft nakedness in portraits behind them
It's fun in a different way, outsider-ish perspective
and co-workers tits are as real as their personalities
Two kids dressed well, with style
sit giggling in front of me
boyfriends and girlfriends now and
plans for new ones in the future
Someone asks hopefully
and what are your plans?
Well in this moment I know that coffee
is a diuretic and I got the large mug.

Being yourself

2009-09-22T12:51:00.003-07:00

I've been doing a lot of wandering around, feeling pensive and restless...soul searching I think it might be called.

After this last, difficult, break up I finally, truly understood things about myself that I'd easily ignored in the past.
A while ago someone(probably my dad) said that for a relationship to work you need to be able to make compromises.
I battled with myself for a long time, making compromises because they were good for "us", because a healthy relationship is key. Because being in a relationship means moving forward, being a part of something, having a teammate. You support each other, you have a date to a show or a real excuse for some dude who wants to get on you. You stay home and talk about your future kids names and complicitly* eat junk food together. It's really really nice.

But I don't want it. I just realized, I don't wanna do those things. I'm an adventurer with a penchant for laziness, for immediate happiness and I've been letting the latter take over when it comes to companionship. I want a relationship, I want commitment, I want love. But stronger than those feelings sits a desire for ultimate freedom, to make my own decisions, to take whims seriously.
And now that I'm not that irrationally shy teenager with a million quirks...I can. I worked hard to not be scared of the world, to take the desires that so burned in my heart and make them happen and I'm not ready to stop and commit to any one person, any one place or any one way of being.

Realizing this was great. I made a bet with my brother that I would stay out of a committed relationship for a year, when I one day have money I'll go to shows alone and if some bean bag comes over looking terribly uninteresting my excuse can be that I don't want to. Taking charge of ones life! It's going to be really awesome eventually. In the meantime there are some bumps... it's a learning process. I've come up with a few guidelines for myself while I get my bearings:

Don't drink alone, especially at home. Bored and everyone you know has school or work in the morning? Read your damn book. watch a movie. Go to sleep. Do not
get drunk and leave 50thousand FB comments at 2 AM. I know good ideas come at that time but write them down and find out how good they are in the morning.
Keep your vocal desires for sex to yourself, or vent at ladies night. Really!
Use this time to be more productive. Cut more hair, finish sewing clothes, do a fundraiser that actually happens.
Bike more. Bike when your restless. Bike when you're bored. Bike always.

That's it for now. Wish me luck!

*I know its not a word, but it could be if we acted like it was.

time to get real

2009-07-28T20:59:00.002-07:00

Theory:

Women with more confidence in their bodies are more likely to date a man who is shorter than 5'8.

Men with more confidence in their height will still date 18 year olds.

Bad Breath Kisses

2009-05-13T16:03:00.000-07:00

Bad breath kisses

Are often dismissed

First thing in the morning

A sorry to do

When all that is meant

Is dear “I love you

Even when you’re puffy

And crusty from passing out

After a long night of pool

And beers”

In Public

2009-05-09T11:06:00.001-07:00

When people talk
and you want to know
just who are they
to say those things
so loudly, what in them
is so bold?
six beers each, at noon I think.

Maya Angelou

2009-03-13T13:28:00.000-07:00

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...

enough

money within her control to move out

and rent a place of her own,

even if she never wants to or needs to...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...

something

perfect to wear if the employer,

or date of her dreams

wants to see her in an hour...

A WOMAN SHOULD

HAVE .

a youth she's content to leave behind....

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..

a past juicy

enough that she's looking forward to

retelling it in her

old age....

WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..

a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .

one friend who

always makes her laugh.. and one who lets her cry...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...

a good piece

of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her

family...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..

eight

matching plates, wine glasses with stems,

and a recipe for

a meal,

that will make her guests feel honored...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .

a feeling of

control over her destiny..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD

KNOW...

how to fall in love without losing herself..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to quit

a job,

break up with a lover,

and confront a friend

without;

ruining the friendship...

EVERY WOMAN

SHOULD KNOW...

when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK

AWAY...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that she can't change the length of her calves,

the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that her

childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

what she

would and wouldn't do for love or more...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW....

how to live

alone... even if she doesn't like it...

EVERY

WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. .

whom she can trust,

whom she can't,

and why she shouldn't take it personally...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

where to

go...

be it to her best friend's kitchen table..

or a

charming Inn in the woods....

when her soul needs

soothing...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..

What she can and can't accomplish in a day...
a month...and a year...

2009-03-05T20:38:00.002-07:00

Nothing can be sweeter on your thighs than the balmy night air, that's why riding a bicycle in your underwear is such a great idea.

changes

2009-02-14T21:06:00.000-07:00

When you finally unlock one of life's mysteries after going your whole life trying to figure it out, you think when you wake up the next morning everything will be different. Surely everyone will see what is different in you, in the world as a whole.
You've figured it out! You have the answer!

What actually happens can only be a something of a let down. After such a high you realize they'll only know when they experience it themselves, if they do. And they don't know how much you know what you know. At least not for a while, till your rich or really obviously happier than everyone or something.

So just settle in, just write down what you've done and look at that every few weeks to remember. The human mind has a way of forgetting.

Mustachio Madness

2009-02-10T11:57:00.004-07:00

Last Friday I went the the Monotonixs show and got clocked in the face and the singer fell on me several times and many people poured beer all over each others hair and faces and necks and we sweatsweatsweat and screamed, sang and laughed and the band and the crowd were in a frenzy from the first beat of the drum.

When you look at their myspace you'll first notice that the music is fun, it's upbeat anarchist smash rock that you can enjoy in the comfort of your own home. But why the hell would you listen to it at home when there's a concert just down the street.

Look at the pictures. Hairy, skinny mostly naked Israeli men with long full-bodied hair. One is hanging from the rafters with a microphone at his bare ass. The crowd below is screaming with smiling faces.

One is a drummer sitting on his drum kit and playing while crowd surfing. Later the drum kit is set on fire, while still being played.

Look at the videos, Austin October 2008 at The Mohawk. I see my friend Devon in the front, punching the drums. I see the band carrying the whole thing out to the street and still sounding awesome as hell! At the last show I managed to catch sight of Devon climbing a tree with the singer and them holding each other, thrashing around wilding and singing. That was before the fist came and caught me in the nose, knocking off my glasses. It was after my room mate mistakenly slapped his friend in the frenzy after getting kicked in the back by someone else. All in joy, in crazy fun for the sake of being alive.

That's a Monotonixs show.

They'll be in Austin for SXSW, I can't recommend it enough.

2009-02-06T14:46:00.003-07:00

Me: Walking down the street

Guy in Truck: Grinning, no sign of front teeth. "Damn girl why don't you hop in here with me?"

Me: Scowling. "Piss off."

Guy in Truck: Laughs, drives on.

What should have happened

Me: Walking down the street

Guy in Truck: Grinning, no sign of front teeth. "Damn girl why don't you hop in here with me?"

Me: Picks up rock, throws it. "How you like a rock in your window, ass?"

Guy in Truck: Visibly upset about the rock through his window

Indian Summer

2009-02-06T14:42:00.001-07:00

Indian Summer - Dorothy Parker
==================
In youth, it was a way I had
To do my best to please,
And change, with every passing lad,
To suit his theories.

But now I know the things I know,
And do the things I do;
And if you do not like me so,
To hell, my love, with you!

Tuberculosis

2009-02-02T14:13:00.004-07:00

What oh, what have I been up to lately? Aside from barely working, changing bike tubes and reading internet comics I have also been taking a drawing class once a week.
During my last class the project was self portraiture. The lighting wasn't great and I looked and felt tired. But a project is and so I did it.

The result is a fairly exact replica. I had noticed that I'd drawn myself kind of intensely but it's hard to draw a facial expression from a mirror so when I showed my friend and she began laughing I was confused. Apparently it's the look I give when I want a person or peoples to leave now. It was the look I had at 4AM after our 300+ Michael Jackson party and the only people left were strangers...it was the look I had when I'd been spending an entire weekend with a friend and had run out of things to do that took two people and it's the look you'll get if you interrupt me while I'm reading The Watchmen.

----------------------

"and I listened to that song so many times before I realized...he's not singing about a girl, he's singing about Tuberculosis"

2009-01-28T22:03:00.002-07:00

My good friend Lydia sent me a link to this gallery of art pieces made with unusual materials as featured by Telegraph.co.uk

Pretty cool stuff

you get noogied

2009-01-28T00:18:00.002-07:00

If you're out and about with someone and they call something which is considered bad "gay" is it appropriate to tell them you'll "noogie them till their brains bleed" if they say it again? Is that an overreaction? I feel like it isn't. Not totally...

The Inauguration of President Barack Obama

2009-01-21T20:56:00.001-07:00

These are 48 photos of Inauguration Day as seen around the world. Pretty amazing stuff.

Låt den rätte komma in

2009-01-19T14:06:00.002-07:00

After watching "Let the Right One In" on Friday I found myself feeling rather tense this early morning as I cycled in the dark to work. I couldn't stop worrying there might be something hungry in the trees, readying to drop on me.

2009-01-17T17:52:00.001-07:00

Nod to Lan for this interesting story:

EASTON, Pa. – A supermarket is defending itself for refusing to a write out 3-year-old Adolf Hitler Campbell's name on his birthday cake. Deborah Campbell, 25, of nearby Hunterdon County, N.J., said she phoned in her order last week to the Greenwich ShopRite. When she told the bakery department she wanted her son's name spelled out, she was told to talk to a supervisor, who denied the request.

Karen Meleta, a ShopRite spokeswoman, said the store denied similar requests from the Campbells the last two years, including a request for a swastika.

"We reserve the right not to print anything on the cake that we deem to be inappropriate," Meleta said. "We considered this inappropriate."

The Campbells ultimately got their cake decorated at a Wal-Mart in Pennsylvania, Deborah Campbell said Tuesday.

A Wal-Mart spokesman told The Associated Press on Wednesday that in light of the incident, the company would review its guidelines regarding cake decorations and other requests.

"It's clear that in serving this customer, some people were offended," spokesman Greg Rossiter said. "As a result, we're going to review our policies."

Heath Campbell said he named his son after Adolf Hitler because he liked the name and because "no one else in the world would have that name."

The Campbells' two other children are named JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, who turns 2 in a few months, and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, who will be 1 in April.

Campbell said he was raised not to avoid people of other races but not to mix with them socially or romantically. But he said he would try to raise his children differently.

"Say he grows up and hangs out with black people. That's fine, I don't really care," he said. "That's his choice."

He said about 12 people attended the birthday party Sunday, including several children of mixed race.

The Kavorka

2008-12-22T15:53:00.005-07:00

I was standing in a hot shower today, drinking a whiskey on ice, letting my mind wander. Inevitably I ended up thinking about sex. Hmmmmseeexxxx. I know that most people enjoy it, hell I've known that for years! What I'd only recently considered was in what way people enjoy it. Why do you enjoy it? What part is the draw? Is it the power you can have over another person? The intimacy? Can you only enjoy it with someone you love or, alternatively, with someone you hate, or don't even know?

I thought about why I like it. I've had a diverse sex life in some ways. I like to try new things but am not yet into anything particularly kinky, I'm attracted to a wide variety of people and their many qualities, shapes,sexes, colors and sizes. I can enjoy sex with someone I love nearly as much as someone I don't know so well, albiet very differently. I really appreciate all the different aspects and options that can be had. Quiet and loving, rough and crazy, in the dark or in a spotlight(hurrhurr). It's all with it's benefits.

But mostly I just love the texture of sex. I love skin and all the ways it can feel against my face or under my hands, how cold and clean in the winter. I like how it tastes on my tongue on a balmy night when all the windows are thrown open to tempt a breeze in.

The scent of said skin is also big. There's something about individual body scent and I don't mean perfumes or cologne. That rich, warm feeling you get in a quiet moment, when you bury your head in their neck, between nape and ear and you smell the life inside them, you can feel their heart against your chest and it's addicting.

I've always been pretty attracted to thick dark hair as well, I enjoyed Carlito's Way more because Al Pacino had such an amazing head of hair. You could lose your hand in it, it was so thick. I like having something to pull, something to tangle in my fist or smooth out with soft fingers.

I like the urgency, the connection, the deep soft kissing and the texture. I love the texture of it all.

On a bicycle at night

2008-12-12T13:28:00.004-07:00

The strange beauty of life comes to me as I ride my bike, half drunk with the stars over and around me and the moon and the earth and I feel that intense love of being. It swells my heart and I pedal harder, faster to relieve the almost painful feeling. To feel it is one thing, what to do with it is something else.

Harder and faster, my breath deepens as I attempt a tall hill. I smile at this friend I love to hate, I welcome its challenge. When I'm done I coast for a while, feeling the crisp air cool my sweaty skin, calm my panting, ruffle my hair. The bike begins to slow and I don't try for the pedals, just let it be until at last we are at a crawl, the bike and I, and together we fall sideways onto a lawn in a tangle and I just lie there, feeling the prickling grass on my back and neck below me, feeling the glow of the moon on my closed eyelids.

"Are you alright?"

There is a youngish woman standing over me, she also has a bicycle.

"I saw you fall off your bike...do you need help?"

I smile and shake my head. She considers this, then looks up at the sky. Then back to me. Another moment and without a word she's set her bike down, she's laying next to me and we stay that way on the grass, just being.

This strange beauty of life.

Snow in Texas

2008-12-10T08:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday morning it was about 80 degrees and humid as all hell. I biked to work and arrived sweaty, pulling my jacket off down to the tanktop underneath. The rest of the day stayed that way, until around 4 when a gale came in with the cold and put our jackets back on our shoulders.

By 6 I was wondering if I would be able to ride my bike to meet a friend like I said I would, but they were coming from even further away and hadn't said anything about picking me up or cancelling, so out I went.
It wasn't so bad, until I left the bike lane on Guadalupe and the wind came head first over me, nearly stopping my bike completely and making me swerve into traffic.
I got off and walked some of the way, until I was out of the main tangle of traffic and then jumped back on and rode to Spider House.

3 hours later

It'd been raining and we'd waited it out for a while, but couldn't stay forever. I considered taking up residence at Spider House but for some reason my friend didn't think it made sense. We wiped down our seats and took off, ears freezing, backs soon pelted with hard rain, turning into sleet. We parted ways at 14th street, my friend insisting they would be ok to make it the rest of the 15-20 minutes home in this weather. As I said goodbye and turned down 14th street the wind became stronger and the sleet became hail, stinging, stinging, face tenderizing hail. I yelled and went faster. In times like these you have to put your head down and remember your one goal: get home.

6 minutes later I was there. 7 minutes later I was changed. 10 minutes later my friend called to say they'd made it in record time and were going to take a hot shower.
12 minutes later, cup of tea in hand, I hear my roommates exclaiming about the snow. I look out side and sure enough it's actual snow, big flakes in fact. The melt upon impact, the ground is not nearly cold enough to keep them, but look, it really is snowing in Austin!

2008-11-19T11:36:00.002-07:00

Hello Buddies!

I just joined the Hill Country Ride for AIDs. A few months ago I told Annie I wanted to sign up for it when registration opened. The other night she came in and reminded me, and though I was reluctant at this time, Annie did force me to do it anyway, and I thank her.
This means I'll start training for the race, which is in April, soon. I'll need teammates and I'll need sponsers.
If you live in Austin and you feel like getting fit on your bicycle for a good cause you can register at www.Hillcountryride.org
If you live anywhere at all and want to sponser me, my goal is 500 Dollars minimum. A dollar helps, 50 is even better :)
Here is my page: http://hcr.convio.net/site/TRC/HillCountryRideforAIDS/General?pg=peditor&fr_id=1080&px=1239741

2008-11-17T16:20:00.002-07:00

I withdrew from my only class two weeks ago. The second I signed the yellow slip I felt better, lighter, happier. On my walk home I had 2 new ideas for an art project I'd failed to give enough focus to before.

It was a math class, a subject I've never been too successful with and at this stage struggle to care about. I want to take Art classes and computer classes to further my career interests, I want to take English and History for personal knowledge. But not math, not math at all.

Hm.

I recommend Lockpick Pornography by Joey Comeau, the whole thing has been put online and as usual, Joey Comeau has done a great job. If you haven't heard of him, check out www.Asofterworld. com for a gentle introduction before you voraciously seek out his other work.

2008-10-16T11:30:00.002-07:00

Fortune cookie says:

Look to a friend when you are confused,
they are a great voice
when you can't hear your own.

2008-10-13T13:20:00.001-07:00

Skim milk is just milk with water. It's disgusting.

A bicycle for Madge

2008-10-08T13:00:00.002-07:00

After a month of obsessively checking craigslist and making fruitless bids on ebay I have finally secured myself a road bike. It's no Bianchi but a Vintage Panasonic Sport 1000 will do me well for now.

Freeeee

VP Debates

2008-10-07T11:57:00.003-07:00

This might be a little edited to the left, but it's pretty accurate from what I saw live last week:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXJ4Dk33cCQ

T.V. on the Internet

2008-09-25T08:09:00.005-07:00

God, why do my housemates watch so many Bravo shows? It's everything I never wanted in life. It's like watching the Sex in the City movie over and over. I can't hear another story about a man who eats too much and how his poos smell, don't want to see into the life of Rachel Zoe, don't care about Project Runway or any other reality competition show. Maybe I just hate T.V. in general now.

This from someone who watched as much T.V. as I could possibly get away with as a child. Matlock, Days of Our lives, Sanford and Son, Simpsons, Ghost Writer, Batman, Cheers, any terrible Saturday afternoon movie, anything at all, even Power Rangers if I were in a spot. How had to be grounded from the T.V. specifically when I broke a rule, since it was the only thing that would really hurt me to be taken away.

And then I moved out of the suburbs, forgot my shows, got a life and never looked back. Now when I watch T.V. I can't relax, instead there's a nagging feeling I should be doing something else. Like sitting online writing blogs.

2008-09-16T15:32:00.000-07:00

"Obama may be a bit professorial, but at least he is trying to unite the country to face the real issues rather than divide us over cultural differences." - THOMAS L. FRIEDMAN

Blacker the berry...

2008-06-18T22:27:00.001-07:00

Damn Elijah Kelly, you are good looking.

Charlie The Magical Unicorn And Candy Mountain

2008-06-06T16:42:00.001-07:00

Caaaannndy Mouuuntaaiinnn

Day's the same

2008-06-04T22:38:00.004-07:00

What difference can it make to you
if I walk away
We never really knew each other
anyway
You pay me and I stay with you
and there's the little routine
we go through
Comin' in at 4 by 6 we scrape the floor
Sweep away the mess but by 10
Scums back for more
Eat apples, drink milk for lunch
Hope it's enough to keep
me strong until brunch
Scrape again and then it's one
And by them I'm hopin' to God we're done
Go home, take a shower
Draw some toons, go to bed and then
Beep Beep Beep it's that hour
Do it all again til'

American Things

2008-05-11T21:35:00.000-07:00

It was nearing the end of lunch break. I took a half slice of bread from a bag, smeared peanut butter on it with a knife. As an afterthough, I took a little piece of lemon cake from a sample bowl and put it on top, for the sweetness. I turned away from the counter to sit back down. “AHHH!” screamed the 19-year old café manager “what are you doing, that’s yuck!” The others stood up to get a look, make faces, and generally be horrified. I shrugged. “That’s so weird” said a co-worker. “It’s no worse than fairy bread” I said. “Must be an American thing. Fairy bread is normal” the 19-year old mocked, looking to the others for a laugh. My face failed to hide distain, “Butter and sprinkles on white bread is normal?”

The topic was cars. My fellow bakers lamented the jobs lost in factories due to outsourcing in other countries and that there was no choice but to buy foreign. “What kind of car are you looking at, Wren?” asked our boss. “I’m not sure” she paused “but not American. I’d never buy American.” I didn’t look up from my task, since she was baiting me. “I’d NEVER buy American” she said again. No response. “Never American!” she shouted triumphantly.

As it was the end of the day, we each were cleaning up, ready to go home. I was busy scraping the floor while simultaneously chatting with Tina, a fellow baker. “That’s a strange way to scrape the floor” she commented “must be an American thing”. I looked up and saw her grin. She was joking but so what. “The next person that comments about America is getting their face scraped.” I held up the scraper, helpfully “It’s going to be like ‘Son of a Witch’”. Tina grinned wider “Son of a witch? What’s that?”. “It’s a book, based on the Wizard of Oz.” She frowned “Must be an American thing.”

Tiny Beads

2008-05-04T19:49:00.002-07:00

He jabbed his finger at his wrist, pointing to a small beaded bracelet. "It's a fucking lie, isn't it?"
He pointed to the white bead "that's not me" then to a red "that's not you" then to a green one "and that's not Maine, and it never was." he laughed caustically "it's always been a lie"

I sat on the bed, cowed by how awfully close to the truth he was. Not that I'd tell him. Not that he'd really know. I hadn't wanted to mess things up like this. I'd known before that it was probably a bad idea to get deeper into a relationship with someone who clearly had a lot on his mind. His plate was full, but maybe I thought I could help clear it...maybe I really did, but more likely all I did was give second helpings with gravy. I thought I knew what I was doing, was never afraid or uncertain further than a shallow level. Not even when I thought I was pregnant.

That problem had weighed realistically in my heart in a way I'd never felt but at that age there wasn't a choice that seemed plausible. I knew what I'd do and I'd do it more or less as in a dream. Watching without really taking in that it was happening to me.
I wasn't pregnant, but after that things broke down worse than ever. We'd never had a future anyway, there was so much fighting. His jealousy, my selfishness. I knew what was needed when I needed it, acting out the part when I knew he needed me. I'd gotten used to dis-attaching from emotion-can't get in too deep with someone so emotional. Someone has to be the clear head, the calm one, the rational one. That kind of distance doesn't lend itself to deep love, and I did want to love him. All of them.

I guess it was an experiment. A wait-and-see. Maybe I would fall in love this time, probably I wouldn't. The rush was there and it was real. Didn't last.
So he finally figured it out and from the look in his eyes I'd say he's angry but not that surprised.
"This is bullshit" he yells. I formulate a rebound argument, one that'll shut him up, make him at fault. It's a good one: calm, rational and there's nothing he can argue against. I still sit on the bed, arms wrapped around my legs, mouth shut now that that word of right is out. He stands watching me for a beat, then he yanks at the bracelet, which breaks easily and tiny beads spray around the floor. He catches my eye and I recognize this as a good time to shut up. There's nothing real to say anyway. He's right and I won't admit to anything. He'll leave and I'll move out having never seen the red or white or green beads again. Not that I'd looked.

2008-05-01T19:16:00.002-07:00

"Hey, it looks like it's a girls-only day."
"Ohhh now we can talk about girly stuff!"
"Ah yeah, what's your boyfriend like in the sack?"
"What color are your nipples?"
"Do you wear a bra? I wear a bra."

2008-04-23T19:49:00.002-07:00

Oh you!

2008-04-21T08:38:00.001-07:00

I just read this:

Rachel, confronted me with a problem concerning her boyfriend Michael.. "I find it really disturbing when guys don't shave after the 3rd day and I keep telling Michael to shave but he doesn't bother.. I want him to dress up nicely for special occasions, but he wouldn't on my birthday.. I'm just going to wait to see if he surprises me on our one year anniversary" He sounds like a slob to me who needs coaching on how to romance a lady. I'm sure that if a guy liked a girl enough, he would do anything to make her happy. Perhaps Michael is just a guy who'd prefer a casual relationship and Rachel needs a bf who is a bit more cliche.

On this blog: www.memoirsofagirlfriend.com

Maybe I shouldn't be reading any bit of a blog that uses Sex in the City as a reference point for an actual relationship since it'll only confuse and rile me up, but it happened anyway. It was an accident.
But...
Why is an unshaven face disturbing? Maybe it's uncomfortable to kiss, that could be a good reason but disturbing? Does it make you bleed? Does it talk to you while you're sleeping? Does it grow at many vastly different lengths?

And I've heard this "if a guy liked a girl enough, he would do anything to make her happy" too much. Who are you, girls-who-think-this-way? Are you celebrities? Are you very rich and this man is your butler? Does he give you a diamond every time you cry and wipe your bum? What are you doing to make him happy, aside from nagging about his beard. Bitches ain't gonna change just because you told them to.Accept it or move on.

Lastly, what is a cliche boyfriend? Did she mean something else by this? I couldn't guess it.

Perhaps

2008-04-20T19:29:00.002-07:00

If you really love me, say yes
but if you don't, dear please confess
you only answer

Perhaps
Perhaps
Perhaps

But the truth is, quite often, that people want perhaps.
They want hope over "no". Say maybe instead of "no",
then we'll have a few more precious hours or days or months
or even years...
just hang on in the between until we can't stand it anymore.

2008-04-13T20:11:00.002-07:00

Aren't white North Americans stupid and predictable for liking certain things and doing things a certain way?
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/

2008-04-12T19:32:00.002-07:00

The quiet stillness in the room, the sound of the green bristled broom brushing quick strokes over the cold ceramic tiled floor. It was somehow comforting, like the sound of home.
I loved when the maid came because it was a time when I slept best. I'd sit on my bed reading but not reading, silence broken by the sound of the faucet turning, water running warmly into the red plastic bucket, soap mixing and building up foamy suds. Her shoes as she clip clopped over the tiles. She always wore heels to clean. The splash of the water as she squeezed excess till it was just right, not too sloppy, not too dry. Swish of the mop and my book closed, dropped to the floor as my eyes shut, drowsiness pervading my body. She left quietly, taking the money set out on the coffee table. 3 times a week she came. No one needs a floor that clean.

My mouth hurts

2008-04-08T18:18:00.001-07:00

2008-02-25T23:21:00.001-07:00

I'll be in and around about Asia for a month and week so probably won't update. Later doods!

2008-02-23T20:11:00.003-07:00

Stubborn Love by me

2008-02-22T15:51:00.002-07:00

Yes We Can - Barack Obama Music Video

2008-02-19T20:42:00.001-07:00

Remember when we were trying to choose between the lesser of two evils?

Try this at home

2008-02-14T19:01:00.001-07:00

Raw Spinach-one bunch
feta-200gm
tomatoes-3 or 4
pumpkin- 1 kg(or potatoes if you live in the US)
garlic-2 or 3 cloves
Fresh basil

Method:

Rinse the spinach, tear the spinach in half, put that spinach in a big salad bowl.
Take that feta, cut it up, crumble it into big ol' chunks.
Put those tomatoes on a cutting board, cut them in half and put them face up on a baking tray. Sliver up that garlic and put those slivers alllll over the tomato halves.
Douse it all in olive oil, put it in the oven for 10 minutes at 150 celsius, till it's kinda baked but not too mushy.
Cut up the pumpkin, bite sized, douse it in oil, put it in the oven, bake bake bake for 30 minutes or until golden and soft, like a good pumpkin should be.
Tear up some basil. Throw everything into that salad bowl so it joins the spinach, mix it all around.

Everyone loves you, it only cost 10 bucks. the end.

2008-02-08T14:20:00.000-07:00

A man walks up to a bar. At the bar is a cute brunette drinking a cocktail, her friends stand nearby chatting. The man smiles warmly at her "Hey, you come here often? Hah, just kidding, old line. My name's _____, what's yours?" She seems to ponder him for a minute, then says "I know you." He continues to smile but looks somewhat confused. The girls friends are now listening, as is the bartender. Now the girl smiles, not with malice but not with any warmth either. She leans in very slightly to him and says something in a low voice so that only the man can here. His mouth drops slightly, he looks somewhat shocked, demeaned, found out. She turns back to the bar as he leaves, coughing as if to cover an embarassing noise. The bartender waits for the rest of the customers to go back to their conversations, then quietly asks if she knew that man, what had she said. The girl shrugged matter-of-factly " I just said he was the kind of guy who really liked his balls crushed by a stiletto heel. I only wear flats."

2008-01-26T14:49:00.001-07:00

Spanish knobskin sues victims family for damages to his car

From OverQualified

2008-01-22T19:27:00.000-07:00

This is one of my favorite essays from Over Qualified:

Once, a girl and I were in bed together, masturbating. She was on her back, naked, touching herself, and I was above her, mostly naked, doing the same. I was eighteen or nineteen years old, and all I could think about was coming on her breasts. You know, like on the Internet. I think, probably, I was saying something to that effect. I wasn't mentioning the Internet, of course, but I was saying I'm going to come on you, I'm going to come on you. I'm classy like that. I don't remember how she felt about the whole coming-on-her idea, actually, but I can tell you that I was very excited about it. I was almost lying on top of her. I was leaned forward so far. So when I felt my orgasm coming, I looked down between us to watch for, "the come shot."

And then I came in my own eye. It came right at me, like a 3D movie gone terribly wrong, and it stung. I started clawing at my face. She laughed and laughed while I tried frantically to wipe my eye clean. She was curled up naked on the bed, laughing so hard there were tears. I started laughing too. I couldn't help it. We both laughed until it hurt, until the muscles in our cheeks were sore from smiling, and then we looked up at her ceiling, on our backs, exhausted. For the rest of that afternoon, every once in a while one of us would start laughing again and then so would the other. It is one of my favourite memories.
-Joey Comeu

A bucket list

2008-01-20T21:19:00.000-07:00

I haven't watched the movie "The Bucket List", probably because I'm not a middle aged man. But I have written a bucket list before, and accomplished most of the things on it. It's a sort of birthday tradition to do at least one thing on that list, or to at least do something memorable that I haven't done before. Scheduling a sky dive, bungee jump, seeing a kiwi bird takes the pressure off what to do on a birthday and still makes it a celebration. Writing the list usually happens around the new year, to take the pressure off whether or not to make resolutions. It's a chance to face a myriad of the ridiculous fears left over from child hood or the angst of the teens. This years list has been a little more difficult to compile, not because there aren't enough things for me to do, but because the more easy to accomplish have been done. The new list is shorter but will take more work than laying down for a tattoo. Here is most of it:

Go back to school, stay there until a degree is given. Be smarter.
Purchase or otherwise attain a keyboard, practice every day for a year from the day.
Continue trapeze and acrobat work, get good, get strong, get discipline.
See more of the world. I have a month-long trip around Asia planned from the end of Feb.
Take more chances, say yes to your destiny.
Don't be dirt poor. Get a better job or ask for a raise if you need/deserve it.
Be as honest as possible, especially in close relationships ie: friends, family, romantic. This just means be as honest about feelings, wishes, hide less, cut through unnecessary man made shit.
Fire a real gun (in a safe place at a target)

Accomplishing these things is going to be good.They will happen.

Sensitive

2008-01-09T19:32:00.000-07:00

As we entered the carnival I saw to my left a huge moonwalk covered with kids running up the airfilled steps and sliding down the sides. The moonwalk was shaped like a sinking boat. "Is that supposed to be the Titanic?" I asked, turning to the elderly man standing next to me. He nodded, then cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted "Too soon!" and turned away in a angrily.

Nelson to Wellington

2008-01-04T16:35:00.001-07:00

I printed my boarding pass online which meant that I did not go to the counter and so forgot to check my bag. It wasn't until I was on the runway actually looking at the door when I realized "this bag isn't going to fit in there! Why am I carrying it?" luckily as this came over me I turned to see the baggage handler watching me with a smile. I laughed and rolled my eyes to the sky as if to say "how foolish! I have forgotten to check my bag!" He laughed in response and took the bag from me, for which I was glad.

2007-12-09T19:39:00.001-07:00

Who would you rather be?:

Tim
Dawn
David
Gareth

The Fortune

2007-12-08T14:44:00.000-07:00

This one says “people count up the faults of those who keep them waiting”

“What does that one mean?” I asked. “If you show people one fault, and let it linger then they’ll start noticing your other faults.” He answered.

Hmmmm, ok. “What about this one: ‘Honesty is the best policy, but while there is truth in humour there is no humour in truth.” I frowned “that isn’t true…” He agreed “Yeah, what about that saying ‘fact is stranger than fiction.’”

Some of them weren’t fortunes in the slightest. She read aloud “One should feel freedom of the mind.” Someone pushed a filled wineglass to her, which she cheerfully accepted.

I held up the one I’d gotten last night “A fall in a ditch will make you wiser.”

Well. Surely they could have used a better metaphor. Something like, if you play with fire you’re likely to get burned. “A game of sticks can end with one eye out.” I suggested.

Someone down the far end held up theirs “Mine isn’t so true, I’m too far at the end of the table.” “What’s it say?” his neighbour turned quickly to look, knocking over a wine glass which splashed all over the fortune holders front. There was a moment of silence as happens in unexpected accidents. Then they laughed with a surprising ferocity, unable to speak they handed the fortune to the clumsy neighbour who read aloud “You are the centre of every groups attention.”

The Meaning

2007-12-07T16:24:00.000-07:00

“Now, I just have to see this tattoo of yours, what does it say?” he paused to take it in and then, aloud read “Can’t believe how strange it is to be anything at all” and smiled thoughtfully. I hadn’t come up with a good sound bite for why I had it and what it meant but for the most part it hadn’t mattered. Most people didn’t attempt a meaning. “So…is that like that feeling you get every now and then, when you can’t believe that you’re a being alive on this little spinning rock in a massive universe and you’re heart feels so big yet you realize that you’re so small and it’s all so amazing and overwhelming?” he asked.

I blinked, totally bewildered at his description. “Yes. Yes it is. I…can’t believe how accurate you just were.” He grinned “Life really puts the blinders on, doesn’t it? Thank god for that feeling”

2007-12-02T18:05:00.000-07:00

The reason that there are vegetarian foods shaped like meat foods is that we live in a meat eating society. If you are invited to a barbecue and are vegetarian, what will you eat? What can you bring to the table that will fit on those hamburger buns, those hot dog buns, what will go with that mustard or ketchup?
If you are vegetarian and American and you find yourself on Thanksgiving AKA Turkey Day, what is going to be your central dish? Are you satisfied with a bevy of side dish types?
You like chicken but you don't like the politics of meat. You love bacon. You like hot dogs. But you aren't one for creative cooking, you don't know where to begin. What are you going to eat? The Ficken, the facon, the Tofurky...those are just replacements. And they don't taste like meat, anyway.

One mans trash...

2007-11-19T18:10:00.000-07:00

"Alright give us your arm" he instructed. I put my arm into a strong man pose obligingly and watched as he placed the sticky stencil carefully on the inside of my bicep. "Is this lyrics from Tool or somethin'? he asked. Oh God, Tool? "No, it's from a band called Neutral Milk Hotel." I said, paused for a moment but he showed no recognition so I continued, settling onto my back "They're very good." He smiled, then leaned over to begin work. I noticed a flaming Chinese symbol tattooed on the center of his head. He nodded his head over to a man with huge arm muscles and comically tiny head "When I was getting it formatted a ol' Barry wondered why anyone would want to get this on 'em". I took another look at Barry "Is that the guy with the Superman symbol tattooed on his chest?" I asked. "Yeah, that's him." I relaxed back again, contemplating his words. I sighed, "Well, everyone has their own interpretation of life, I guess."
He nodded again. The needle buzzed away on my arm. No going back now, anyway/

2007-10-30T19:57:00.000-07:00

I understand that you are not just the person that I knew when I met you. You are the layers of experiences over a lifetime. Who you are is a growing concept that should not be boxed in to one experience. I'll not box you in, I'll just let you be you instead.

2007-10-14T19:41:00.000-07:00

Hopes and dreams

Rivers and streams

Boats slowly sailing

Come in between the real world and me

Got to forget to remember to play it naturally

Come out of your shell, what’s that you’re protecting underneath

Consider please, a little less dignity

If playing it safe means keeping it boring

Hopes and dreams

Rivers and streams

Boats, are always sailing through coming

In between the real world and me

I never was as good at jumping right in

Making all new strangers into ten new friends

But that doesn’t mean I don’t want ‘em

again and again

It’s like “I notice you don’t have too many friends”

I’m just deep that’s all, just deep into myself,

Reading all the books on the library shelf (so deep)

Working on the newest project that nobody can see but me

Hopes and dreams

Still, deep rivers and streams

Boats sailing, just passing through

Coming in between the real world and me (and I let ‘em)

2007-09-21T14:03:00.000-07:00

The sons gotta shine
yeah he's gonna need time
to figure out a few rhymes
and...work is just a distraction
a forced life time of bizarre interactions
with people you'd never think to call friends but
in the end it builds character.

The Burn

2007-09-18T23:16:00.000-07:00

Today at work I had to cut onions. They stung my eyes and made me cry in front of everyone. I looked like a terrible fool. I hate onions!

2007-09-16T22:21:00.000-07:00

What a beautiful face
I have found in this place
that is circling all round the sun
and when we meet on a cloud
I’ll be laughing out loud
I’ll be laughing with everybody I see
can’t believe how strange it is to be anything at all

2007-09-12T22:50:00.000-07:00

It's hard being a girlfriend these days. First things are great - you get to have sex with a new person, you're feeling liberated and ready to have new adventures in the bedroom. Then you realize how common putting it in the butt is, and you aren't so sure that's for you. But everyone is doing it, it's the new oral. Speaking of oral, don't forget to swallow or it means you don't care/are stunted sexually. You think you want a threesome but actually you're suddenly too shy and too afraid to find someone and if you did try they'd have to be just right so there'd be no regrets. What about the poop, girls? That shit on his wee man doesn't fuck with your head? Man...

2007-09-12T02:08:00.000-07:00

There's also no such thing as "environmentally-friendly." The environment doesn't need friends, because it is the environment. And even if the environment wanted friends, do you really think it would want to be friends with you? I mean, come on, look at you.-Jeff Rowling